The most important relationship you will ever have is with yourself. Everything else stems from there – your energy, your work, your creativity, your relationship with others.
When we disconnect from ourselves – when we stop listening to our heart and intuition – things show up in our lives that we don’t want. All of a sudden we find ourselves stuck in unhealthy or destructive patterns. We attract drama. We get sick. We feel exhausted and unhappy, and we’re not really sure why.
On the flip side, when we reconnect with ourselves, we heal and grow. We live a more authentic, happy and fulfilling life. We are healthier, inside and out. We become a nicer person. We blossom, follow our passions, and become all we are meant to be. And that, ladybird, is a beautiful, blissful thing.
So why don’t we reconnect with ourselves on a daily basis?
Usually the biggest block is fear. It can be very scary to listen in to ourselves. What if we hear something we don’t like? What if our heart tells us it’s not happy with the life we’ve created? What if we have to make some big changes? What if we’re not ready for that?
Being alone with our thoughts can be very confronting. We’re naturally programmed to avoid pain, and tuning in to ourselves might mean coming face-to-face with memories or emotions we don’t want to deal with.
So we do anything we can to distract ourselves. We drown out that little voice inside us with drama, gossip, scrolling (zombie-like) through social media, shopping, throwing ourselves into work, watching hours of trashy TV, or bingeing on food or booze (or both).
Yes, reconnecting with yourself can be scary. But you know what’s even scarier? A life half-lived. By closing yourself off from pain, you also cut yourself from all the beauty and magic of greater intuition, creativity, depth, growth and love.
Need some help getting started? Try these powerful tools to help you get out of your head and back into your heart:
1. Vision/Mood Boards
How do you want to feel? What do you want to see, do, and experience in your precious life? Maybe there’s a dream you’ve had in your heart since you were a little girl, or maybe you’ve just started to feel the pull from something recently. Maybe you dream of freedom from destructive patterns or anxiety, and living a bold, happy existence.
The first step is being honest about what you really want. The second is to understand that you deserve it. Truly, you do.
Click here to learn more and create your own Vision or Mood Board to rock your dreams.
2. Morning Pages
The ‘Morning Pages’ method is a fantastic tool devised by Julia Cameron. Keep a notebook by your bed and write three full pages when you wake up every morning. Write anything at all – no-one ever has to read it (including you).
Some of my clients find it helpful to start with anything they remember from their dreams, then anything that’s still bugging them from the day before (they guy who cut them off in traffic, the report they handed in late, etc), and then ending on a positive note with things they’re grateful for and looking forward to. But there are no rules. It’s simply a tool to unload your subconscious, leaving you unencumbered and free.
There’s a time every morning when we are half awake, half asleep and not quite fully conscious. At those moments, we have access to our unconscious mind and our inner workings. But like dew on the morning grass, it will soon be gone without a trace. Listening to these tender morning wisps allows us to reach into our inner world, the deeper part of ourselves that helps guide us on our path of transformation. – Julia Cameron
Whereas Morning Pages are geared towards a simple purge and release, journalling can have more structure. Journalling be a great way to explore your deepest fears and desires. You can choose to explore a certain topic each day, or just carry a notebook with you and jot things down when they spring to mind. You can write a gratitude journal, or record your heart’s dreams and intentions.
In The Sparkle Project we discover huge breakthroughs using a ‘morning intentions’ journal to set our intentions for the day, and an ‘evening reflections’ journal to reflect on what went well, what didn’t, and what we’d like to work on going forward.
Start a journal and just see where it takes you.
I know, I know. This one can be tough. It is for me sometimes too. But it can also be the most rewarding – by far. Meditation helps to melt away the tension and worries, and allows you to be still long enough to really tune in to yourself.
Start with just a few minutes per day, and build up from there. Try beginner meditation apps like Headspace and Omvana (which has a great intro meditation from Spirit Junkie, Gabby Bernstein). Or check out this beautiful meditation track from my gorgeous friend Vanessa.
A tool favoured by top athletes, even just a few moments of visualisation per day will reap huge benefits. And best of all? You can do it anywhere. When you wake up, on the bus, or (my personal favourite) right before you fall asleep.
Imagine yourself blissfully happy, or free of a destructive behaviour or eating pattern. You’re the healthiest and most confident you’ve ever been. Visualise it in bold technicolour. What does it look, taste, sound, smell and feel like?
Just like meditation, visualisation can be a bit tricky at first. If you need some help getting started, look for free guided visualisations like this or this.
Craving more tools to help you reconnect? Join us in the new and improved Sparkle Project! Our 6-week, love-soaked, journey of transformation will help you reconnect with yourself (and your body) on the deepest level. Click here to learn more and jump on board. x